Thursday, April 25, 2013

Italics


If my words were put on paper
They would be written in italics
Like a letter leaning over
My mind is full of unbalance.

If desire selects one thing
Sense decides another
Leaving a teeter-totter where
Swaying from one side to another,
I fall forward.

Though I may stumble
And sway
Like a sailor fresh off the sea
And onto a quaking San Francisco street
I move.

For a few steps in the direction
Of an image quite distant,
My tongue producing rhythm
Masterful lyricism;
Slick Rick and Andre
They make me a victim
To an imaginative mind.

Lunging again into the real
I quickly leave
Due to little appeal.

Again I strike it big
With fame and fortune
A California dream
Much different than truth
Of ghettos and smog
And more plastic
Than natural flesh,
But I disregard
Because I want the rest.

Until sense pushes desire,
And aggression starts a fight;
Beaten but not defeated
Strength pushes on
Stumbling to the left
Then leaning slightly to the right.

Tuesday, April 23, 2013


Scratched into the surface of the bathroom mirror were the words, “YOU ARE BEAUTIFUL.”

A young man, intoxicated and nearing unconsciousness, slouched on the floor in the corner. The single dim bulb hanging from the center of the ceiling produced just enough light to reveal the sanguine walls were not pure. From baseboards to ceiling, messages were scrawled on every inch of wall. Though there was writing everywhere, the mirror was clean aside from its single message. The young man in the corner had become a part of the setting, absorbed into the atmosphere of the bathroom.
He was near asleep now, but his state of being had changed. Slowly his consciousness was going, but the last part of his brain left awake was sober; despite the spinning room he could see clearly and his perception was quick. His eyes moved over everything, shifting from the worn wooden door, to the dirty linoleum floor, to the dripping of poor plumbing under the sink, to the beer stain on the collar of his rumpled suede jacket, and back to the door.

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As his eyes stayed on the door, watchful like he was expecting a certain person, a man walked in. He was most likely still in his twenties and it looked like he had landed a solid job after college. Judging by his clean outfit complimented by a black tie, freshly shined leather shoes and a Rolex, he had probably graduated with a degree in business from NYU or George Washington. Finishing school with zero debt thanks to family money, he was undoubtedly given some job here in Manhattan with hardly any qualifications, earning more money off the bat than hundreds of others in the same company who had worked for years and were much more deserving. But when your father knows people, lack of credentials and effort don’t matter.
            It wasn’t just his outfit that gave all this away; it was his smirk. It wasn’t a youthful, excited smirk that would suggest he thought he would be getting lucky that night; it was one of ignorance, put on with effort to insinuate he could buy luck, and it showed he had a disgusting love for himself—a love greater than any he would ever gift a woman or other human or any thing on the Earth.

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